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I can’t believe some of the things I forgot! OKOKOK so while I disappeared from the blogosphere my neighbors TREE….FELL THROUGH MY FENCE!  There was no storm or wind that caused this.  It was just a dead tree that decided it no longer wanted one of its branches attached to it any longer.  It happened sometime between 4:00pm and 9:3pm.  I was letting the Captain out to do his business and I happened to glance over towards the right side of my backyard and this is what I see…..

 

WAIT…you need to see the close up. 

Yeeeaaahhhhh.  That is my neighbor’s/developer’s big ass tree limb or is it a branch?  Whichever one is bigger, limb or branch, that is what it is.  The white thing is the top to a cooler that I used to cover the gap in the fence so that Mr. Swarley could not pull a Houdini.  So the thing about this tree is that it is right smack dab in the middle of the property line between my neighbor’s yard and the developer’s property.  What does that mean you ask?  That means Maggie is up the creek watching the paddles float slowly away.  Sigh…  Anyway, the fence had to be fixed so I called up my AWESOME cousin Randy who lives about 45 minutes away.  Randy and his oldest son Davis drove on up to my house one Sunday with fence slats they had left over from when they put up their fence.  Randy and Davis got the branch out of the fence and began to fix my fence. Randy was on my side and Davis was on the neighbor’s side.  Halfway through the repair Davis says, “Dad, the neighbors opened their back door and are staring at us.  What do I do?” To which Randy replied, “Ask them to come help!”  The neighbors apparently heard this as they then closed their door.  Well my two favorite men, Randy and Davis fixed my fence for me and here is the final product.

  YAAAAAAA!!!!! 

And that children is all you get tonight.  I feel my mono actin’ up again….time to take a nap…er ah, I mean pretend to be 80 years old and go to bed at 7:45.  🙂 

PS….Dear Lord, please let me be able to move tomorrow without too much pain.  LOL

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WHOA!  So I’ve disappeared for a while, but I’m back.  LEt me give you a quick little run down of what has been going on since my last check in.  I GOT MONO!  HOw the hell does a 31 year old woman come down with mono?  No, I had not been running around kissing everyone I came into contact with nor did I eat and drink after anyone.  There is no telling how I got it but boy did I get it. I was sick as a dog and home from work for 3 weeks.  I’m much better now thank you very much.  Other than that I have no excuse for why I abandoned my blogging.  But I’m back and ready to continue on this crazy journey of finding myself.  Where to begin…

Well I have officially started my training for Tough Mudder….today…finally….I hope I can keep doing this.  The plan is to do that stupid couch to 5k thing that it seems like everyone is doing.  I managed to get off of my rather large rump this afternoon and hit the streets.  I did it.  Day one of week one completed and I want to cut off my own legs because of how badly they hurt. Here’s the thing.  For about a year I was going to a boot camp class three times a week.  Well I’ll be honest it was more like twice a week and there were spurts of consecutive weeks.  ANYWAY, I was going and was in the best shape I had been in for a very long time.  I felt great and I could do all kinds of things without getting tired or winded.  Then the fit hit the shan.  My grandmother died, Brian left and I GOT MONO!  So I’ve finally decided to get in shape and be the healthiest Maggie I can be.  Enter Tough Mudder.  Why do I want to do this?  Because I WANT TO BE A BADASS.  And I’m gonna be.  🙂  So I had to start somewhere and C25k it is. 

Back today and my out of shape self.  I knew I had been pretty inactive for a a few months and I knew I wouldn’t be able t breeze through this whole running thing but DANG I didn’t know I’d want to crawl into the ditch on the side of the road and lay in the cool water flowing behind the houses. I didn’t.  Swarley stopped me.  Swarley is my dog.  He’s the best little pup every.  Just when my legs cramped up and I started staring longingly at the ditch Swarely BOLTED and took me with him.  I managed to make it home and cook myself a yummy low cal dinner.  SO GOOD.  Seriously yummy.  I ate and sat down on the couch and remembered this….my bloggy blog. 

Let’s see.  What else has happened.  OOOOH I know.  My wedding dress got delivered to my parents.  Yup.  The beautiful dress that I was looking forward to wearing while I married Brian was delivered to my mom and dads.  Mom is awesome and just left it in the box it came in and put it in the back of a closet, cause ya know, I’ll need it one day right?  Right!  That hit me pretty hard and was tough to deal with, but I think I’m doing alright with it.  The thing is, I’m trying not to focus on the things that I don’t have.  You know, a fiance and a wedding to plan.  I’m focusing on what I want and the things that I need to do to get to where I want to be.  Like training for Tough Mudder.  🙂

So I will say this.  Brian and I are talking.  He has made some big ol’ changes and it has made all the difference in the world.  He is working through all of the “stuff” he needs to work through and is doing his best to be happy and find himself.  I’m proud of him.  There is still hope for us.  It’s a very thin line of being silly and following my heart and making myself listen to my head.  It’s a slow process but it’s all part of finding me. I can’t say that I don’t love him.  The thing is, I no longer love the Brian that was living in my house until June.  I do however, find myself falling in love with this new Brian.  You’d think that after 3 1/2 years you would know a person inside and out.  I didn’t and I still don’t.  I know that this Brian I am getting to know is as different from the old Brian as he is similar and that gives me hope.  I’m just listening to my heart and keeping in mind what my head says.  Turns out, I’m a pretty smart gal at times.  I know there are a lot of people who would tell me to run as fast as I can from Mr. Goodman.  The thing is, in the past I was one of those people.  Even when I thought we were happy there were times that if I had a friend that was dealing with the things I was dealing with I’d have told her to RUN BITCH RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN AND DON’T LOOK BACK! I’ve thought about my situation with B now and asked myself many many times what Maggie the friend would say to this Maggie and the thing is, I’d tel her to do what is going to make her happy.  I’ve made some pretty big changes in my life and am starting to be a good blend of the old and new Maggie and this Brian seems like he could make me happier.  I know now that I don’t need him to make me happy.  I’m happy without Brian. I need a man who will make an already happy Maggie happier and I think this new Brian may be that man.  Only time will tell and I’ve got my eyes WIDE open.

I feel like I am finally well on my way to “finding myself”….yes I used finger/air quotes with this.  🙂 

Now for your viewing pleasure…CAPTAIN SWARLEY!

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